Learn
Connection on your terms.
Friendship & Social Energy
Friendship doesn’t have to mean big parties and daily calls. Here’s how to spend social energy wisely — and connect in ways that fit your brain.
The guide, as designed. The same content is written out below.
See page 2
Energy goes out. Energy comes back.
Your social battery
Many ND people describe social energy as a battery that drains faster in some settings than others. Knowing your drains and chargers helps you plan.
A battery with five levels: Empty · Low · Okay · Good · Full
- Busy group chats
- Loud parties
- Small talk
- Surprise plans
- One-on-one time
- Shared interests
- Parallel activities
- Quiet together
The Connection Menu
Today’s specials · order what fits
- Send a meme
- React to a post
- Voice note, no reply needed
- Watch a show “together”
Small signals that say “thinking of you.”
- Parallel play
- A walk side by side
- Coffee for one hour
- Co-working or body doubling
Together, with a built-in focus.
- Game night
- A long phone call
- Cooking a meal together
- A day trip or event
Save these for the good days.
Every item counts as connection. Small is still real.
Finding your people
Where to look
Friendships often grow easiest around a shared “thing” — it gives you something to talk about and a reason to keep showing up.
- Interest groups Book clubs, maker spaces, chess
- ND-led meetups No masking required
- Online communities Talk at your own pace
- Classes Built-in structure each week
- Volunteering A clear job to focus on
- Fandom spaces Cons, forums, fan servers
Friendship scripts
Borrow these words
“I’m going to the board game café Saturday afternoon. Want to come? No pressure either way.”
“Thanks for asking! I’m low on energy this week — could we do something quieter soon?”
“I’ve hit my limit for tonight, so I’m heading home. I’m really glad I came.”
“Hey! I went quiet for a while — that’s just how my brain works sometimes. I’ve missed you.”
Your turn
Jot down who fills your battery — and how you like to connect.
My people
How I like to connect
For education and community support, not diagnosis. For personal guidance, reach out to a neurodivergent-affirming professional.
Sources and credits. SOLA · Community Resource · Friendship & Social Energy