Practice
Untangling a Shame Moment
Neurodivergence & Shame · Worksheet
Pick one recent moment. Move slowly. You're separating what happened from what shame said it means.
Pairs with: Shame & the ND Brain; Shame at Work, at Home & in Love
Members can fill this in online and keep their answers in their Library. Each visit adds a new entry. Or download the PDF to print.
The worksheet, as designed. The same content is written out below.
Shame level now
012345678910
02
1
What happened?Just the facts, the way a camera would record it.
03
2
What did shame say about me?Write it word for word, even if it's harsh.
04
3
Where did I feel it? Tick all that apply
Circle any that fit.- Hot face
- Tight chest
- Sinking stomach
- Wanted to hide
- Froze or went blank
- Got defensive
- Teary
- Numb
- Other:
05
4
What was my brain up against? Tick all that apply
Context isn't an excuse. It's information.- Sensory overload
- Low sleep or energy
- Hungry
- A transition or surprise
- Unclear expectations
- Masking all day
- Fear of rejection
- Too many demands
- Other:
06
5
Is there anything to repair? This is where shame turns into guilt you can act on.
- Yes. My repair could be:
My repair could be:
- No. This was a brain-needs moment.
Nothing to fix about me. What I needed was:
07
6
What would I say to a friend with my brain?Now say it to yourself.
08
7
One soft next stepSmall and kind. Rest counts. Telling someone counts.
Shame level after untangling:
Any drop counts. No drop is okay too. Some moments need more time or support.012345678910
If this brings up a lot, pause and reach out to someone you trust. Educational only, not therapy.
Sources and credits. Pairs with Brain Library handouts "Shame & the ND Brain" and "Shame at Work, at Home & in Love."